Movie Review: Ek Thi Daayan…daya karo!!

 

Before you start inundating me with the obvious questions, allow me to explain. Horror is perhaps the only genre that I haven’t seen altogether (including the classics like Evil Dead and Omen series). So far, I have tried to change that trend with The Cabin in the Woods (an intentionally comic horror flick) and Bhoot Returns (an unintentionally comic horror flick) so as you can see there hasn’t really been much success in that department so far. Thus, when Ek Thi Daayan released with supposedly spine chilling suspense and new age horror unseen in Bollywood, till date..I assumed (wrongly) that this would be my chance to put a tick in that box as well. Forget ticking the box, if I could take back the 134 minutes I wasted in the hall, I’d willingly pay for it

To put it mildly, the movie is pathetic save for some truly special special effects (which have nothing to do with the horror, by the way – the horror effects are horrifically bad) and an angelic little girl with such a cute voice, she’s the only one you want should survive the ordeal. Of course, Konkana Sen Sharma’s act is worth a mention too and Huma Qureshi looks pretty as ever, but all this pales in comparison to the shockingly bad plot and its equally miserable execution

There is not one scene in the movie wherein you feel that creepy sensation down your spine – not one moment wherein you feel breathless in anticipation, not knowing where the next thrill is coming from. Instead what you get is a predictable plot, with known villains and villainesses and no thrills to be had
I am not sure, in fact, I am completely bamboozled how this movie is not supposed to have the usual stereotypes. I haven’t even seen many horror movies, yet even I could identify the stereotypes miles away.
Please be informed, this movie is a lesson in ‘daayans’ and ‘pishaajs’ (first time I heard of the concept altogether) and every stereotype you can associate with these two characters – you’ll find in this movie.

There is nothing new or novel in the story telling either. There is nil connect created with the protagonist  You absolutely don’t care what happens to him and would happily accept his death at any point in time in the movie. The fact that this character is being played by Emraan Hashmi doesn’t help matters either. The writing ranges from average to below standard which itself is a shocker considering Vishal Bhardwaj has written this. The songs are mercifully, less in number, but by no means less irritating, save for one melodious ‘Yaaram’

The only thing this disastrous flick would succeed in doing somewhat is unfavorably impacting young impressionable minds to create a stigma against elevators and certain reptiles – am not sure what that accomplishes in the first place. Forget worrying about the movie staying with you – your first thought on emerging from the hall is to try and erase whatever little memory you have of it. Have mercy on yourself – stay away from this one